Today is mine and Dustin’s 4th anniversary! It has been quite a crazy ride but I’m so glad I get to do life with him every day.
Today we went to my OB appointment and I got quite the surprise! I’m already 2 centimeters dilated. At 35 weeks. I have been having a lot of contractions, but I realize that it doesn’t necessarily mean anything. Many women can walk around dilated for weeks. For me, it’s exciting even though I’m having a c-section. It’s awesome that my body isn’t broken like I’d previously believed. I have never dilated past a 1 without Pitocin. I think I got to a 2 with Quentin, but that was at 42 weeks! I’m okay with going into labor early, but I’d like to get through this week first!
Tonight we are going out to dinner and making a couple store stops. Romance is different for everyone and for us it means not cutting up others’ food, having a conversation, and browsing stores without anybody crying. We are eating at the classiest, fanciest establishment, the place where we ate our wedding dinner. Buffalo Wild Wings. We love a good tradition.
The past couple of days have consisted of NESTING FRENZY. My mom is here painting Claudia’s room. I have been cleaning like mad. The rest of this week, I’ll be making nursery decor, pacifier clips, hair bows, and burp cloths. Next week I plan to wash baby clothes and bottles and finalize everything! This is really happening and I can’t believe my blessings. A girl! Oh how I’ve waited so long for her.
I can’t think of a better way to spend my anniversary than soaking up my last pregnancy, having dinner with my groom, and enjoying my children.
I started my weekend off by taking my “Hair growth challenge” in a different direction.
I knew it was going to happen, you knew it was going to happen. Let’s all be disappointed in me for not sticking to anything, ever. I’m just happier with short hair. Always will be. #shorthairforever
Ahhh, March. I don’t think I’ve ever been more excited for a month to come. This is officially the month I meet my daughter. I can’t believe it’s here! We are finally starting on the nursery this weekend. Things are coming together to get ready for the last member of our family!
In general, I love starting a new year, month, week, or even day. Something so promising about starting fresh. I suck at sticking with Instagram photo challenges, but they’re so much fun and I’m totally addicted! This month, I’m thankful for a new chance to stick with one!
For March, I’ll be doing Fat Mum Slim‘s as usual:
I will also attempt the Planner Nerds challenge and maybe some others!
Come join me on Instagram to follow my challenge photos and all the gratuitous selfies and kiddie pictures.
5 Weeks from today, I’ll be snuggling my 1-day-old baby girl. really?! I keep pulling out my calendar and counting again. It’s absolutely surreal to say the least. I am in full-on preparation mode. We are starting the nursery this weekend finally. Yesterday, I bought her first Easter dress and cried. A DAUGHTER! I never thought I’d have this. It’s amazing.
Body Changes: I have gained a lot in the last 2 weeks! Thanks a lot, crappy cravings and laziness. I’m back on track to eating better as of this morning. I have some lovely new stretch marks on my belly too.
Clothes: I got a new maternity shirt, new leggings, and new ponte pants. That’s it for clothing purchases because I’m almost done! Heck yes.
Movement: It is so crazy to feel these intense movements in my belly. I love the amazingness and all, but it really does hurt sometimes.
Sleep: The sleep has reached a new low. I just can’t sleep. Reflux, back pain, pee. It never ends.
Cravings: No specific cravings, but I do tend to eat a lot of sweets these days. I am trying to ignore my cravings and eat healthy again.
Other symptoms: Normal late-stage pregnancy things going on here. Shortness of breath, back pain, pelvic pain, and recent development, ankle swelling when I’ve been on my feet awhile.
Appointment notes: At my OB appointment this morning, we were all surprised to realize how close I am to done! Everything is looking good. I was a little worried about the weight gain I’ve had in the last 2 weeks, but was told no big deal since I’ve not gained much until now. I now start going to appointments weekly! Next week I’ll have my Group B Strep test, as well as a cervical check. I can’t believe we are at this point. Can’t wait to see this little girl!
I have been a fan of A Great Big World’s Say Something since I first heard it. It’s a goosebump-evoking song for sure. When I heard country artist Maggie Rose’s cover, the song catapulted to my favorite song of the moment. I cried the first time I sat down and listened. Sometimes I still cry or, at the very least, erupt in goosebumps when I listen to it. Do yourself a favor and give it a listen from this Bobby Bones show recording. Then, if you are like me and can’t stop thinking about it and pressing play over and over, you should download it on iTunes.
I am more than a little frustrated with myself. All this time we’ve had to prepare for Claudia, I still have a LONG list of things we need to buy and do. I am the worst procrastinator on EARTH. I know that babies don’t actually NEED much and I’ll have all of that before she comes… then I’ll be buying stuff for months after she’s born.
I am officially nesting. Something about the realization that my daughter is coming in less than six weeks has really kicked my ass into gear. I went upstairs to put something away in Nick’s room and before I knew it, I was cleaning and rearranging and planning a DIY project. The problem is, I can never finish cleaning a room because I am so easily distracted!
It definitely feels like Spring is just around the corner. It’s been ranging between 65-70 during the day this week and the sun is shining bright. You better believe I have windows open! My spring baby is coming soon and this out is getting aired out.
We are having an issue with dog urine. Our dog is house trained, but lately has been peeing in the house. I think we aren’t walking her at the right times. In any case, I’m having the worst time getting the smell out of the carpet. I have tried every pinterest recipe and I’ve tried enzyme sprays from the pet store. What’s your fail-proof method?
I have decided to take Session B of this school term off to have the baby. I had originally planned to keep going, but considering how time-consuming and stressful my classes are now, I can’t imagine having a c-section in the midst of it all! So I now have just a couple weeks left before I’ll get a little break. Already excited to hit it hard in summer though! Can’t get this degree done fast enough.
What’s up with you today?
This is our 7th Valentine’s Day! I’m excited to spend it taking the boys to the LEGO movie tonight.
7 Ways Dustin and I Love
1. We speak in our own language. Most of our lingo comes from the mouths of our children, but we use it without skipping a beat. We also say mean things to each other – fondly, of course. “Okay, Asshole,” I often say.
2. We are intense. When we are annoyed at each other, it’s over-the-top, nearing rage status. And when we are feeling affectionate, we are likely to smother each other.
3. He pays the bills and I buy the groceries. This may seem like a weird way to love each other, but it works for us. My brain doesn’t work in the way it needs to in order to balance the bank account. Dustin gives me a grocery budget every week and I make sure we are all fed for the week on that amount. I couldn’t even tell you the amounts of our bills, because Dustin sees to it that they get paid. If it weren’t for him, we’d be cold and without lights. If it weren’t for me, we’d have some hungry people around this house!
4. We geek it out. It’s only fitting, considering we met online, but we spend a lot of time communication via text, email, gchat, and facebook. It’s just what we do. We have conversation, share pictures, share links and songs, and actually have meaningful interaction that way.
5. We eat. Food is our love language. I cook him healthy and delicious meals and he appreciates that he rarely has to lift a finger for food. And while pregnant, he brings me all the bullshit that I crave, even though he’s not partaking in the sugar and processed food with me.
6. We are lazy. We give each other zero guilt about not bathing the kids, mopping the floor, folding the laundry, or doing the dishes because, well — we both be lazy. Sometimes you just need a pass from these things. So what if we take a LOT of passes?
7. We are partners. The most important thing in our marriage is the fact that we continually support each other and share parenting duties equally. He changes poop diapers if he’s here, no questions asked. He carries kids up stairs. I feed kids and usually bathe them. We both discipline and snuggle them to death.
This morning, I got up when my first alarm went off and came into the kitchen I scrubbed spotless the night before. What a difference it made in my morning! I was able to make breakfast for the family without dodging dirty dishes and clutter and actually had time to have coffee with my son before he began his school day. It’s really important that Nick leaves a smooth household in the mornings. It makes a big difference in his day’s behaviors. Turns out it also sets a great tone for my day as well! As I type this, it’s 10:00 am and I’ve been pretty productive and happy all morning! I’m very sleepy, but I feel motivated to get stuff done. After this post, it’s back to homework and housework!
Speaking of homework, I am not doing so great in school right now. I had As and Bs until this A&P class I’m in. It is really kicking my butt! I made a 47 on my lab practical on the skeletal system. So that was nice. I have to just do my best and keep pushing. Eventually, school will be over and I’ll have my degree.
I have been shopping for a new handbag for almost a week now. Totally not having any luck because I’m picky on a budget. I need something like a tote that will hold my planner and accessories, a makeup bag, and a few kid essentials. I carry a lot! I’m taking another shot at it this evening.
It’s a big mail day for me. I’m expecting Claudia’s car seat today and I’ve already gotten my Levenger Circa punch to customize my planner! I am so excited to sit down and play with it. I’m going to Michael’s this evening to get paper to make my own dividers. thrilled!
What have you been up to this week?
Seriously, HOW am I at 32 weeks already? It’s so weird to think that in 8ish weeks, I will be the mother of a little baby girl. What?! So thankful.
Body Changes: I am up 16 pounds total. Not bad! I have been eating crappy lately and need to dial that back before I go too far!! I have LOVELY spider veins and varicose veins in my right leg now, which is super lovely. Definitely has me thankful that I am not pregnant in summer and having to deal with my legs showing!
Oh, and let’s talk about that belly button. My belly button is so incredibly deep, that is never come anywhere close to “popping.” This time is the closet I’ve ever come and I’m telling you, it grosses me out! But I have a weird belly button phobia going on. That’s a story for another post.
Clothes: I don’t always wear pants, but when I do they’re pajama pants. Ha. I usually stick to leggings when I have to leave the house.
Gender: It’s STILL a girl! I went in for an ultrasound this morning and half expected to see boy parts!
Movement: She moves so much that I can’t figure out anymore how she is positioned. Some part of her is always pressing out on the right side of my upper belly and it HURTS. It makes my belly extremely sore.
Sleep: I’m not sleeping well at all. It’s hard to get comfortable and as soon I do, reflux or a full bladder wakes me up.
Cravings: I just kinda want EVERYTHING at this point. I am almost living off pizza.
Other symptoms: My pelvic issues are still coming and going, along with shortness of breath and lower pack pain. Standard stuff!
Appointment notes: I had an appointment this morning. Only up 1 pound in the last 4 weeks. Blood pressure is good. Baby is head down, has a strong heartbeat, and is looking good! She is about 4 pounds, which puts her in the 40th percentile – pretty much perfect. I’m in love with her darling face.
I had the ultrasound, then saw the doctor and after much discussion and weighing the pros and cons, I now have a c-section scheduled!! It’s so crazy to think that I know my daughter’s birthday. I will meet my daughter on March 31, 2014. I’m actually not anxious about surgery yet, but you know what I’m terrified about? The fact that my surgery is at noon and I can’t eat anything that day. Ha!
I am totally at peace with the c-section (and big YAHOOOOO for getting my tubes died at the same time), but FREAKED THE FREAK OUT that she will be here NEXT MONTH. Now is the time to buckle down and prepare for the little lady!
For months, years even, you’ve all heard me whine and plot. I just wanted to stay at home with my kids full time. Well, short term disability became necessary. It was a horrible reason to need to be home, but I was still feeling blessed just for having had the opportunity. It has been nearly a month now. The reality is, this may not be for me. Hey, I can admit when I [might] be wrong. Now, it’s not over and nothing has been decided. The simple truth is, I can’t have the kind of lifestyle I want without my income. I had hoped I would be able to bring in enough from home, but we all know that’s easier said than done. I’m a dreamer, what can I say? I still haven’t given up hope on that, but really there’s more to it…
I have come to realize that there is a part of my identity wrapped up in being a working mother. When I see posts from my friend Mel, who I consider to be the quintessential working mom, I feel pangs of jealousy. I am the type who takes a lot of pride in doing it all.
I think about the future, because that is what we are readying our children for, right? I don’t want them to look back and think of mom sitting around in leggings and unbrushed hair, yelling about crumbs in the couch. I want them to remember a vibrant mother who wore red lipstick, smelled great, and spent all weekend creating special moments. I want them to remember that I worked hard to finish my education, bring in family income, and keep family relationships strong. I want them, especially Claudia, to have the example of working hard to be an independent woman. It’s just something that is important to me. For the boys, I want them to see first-hand that women can do everything men do, and just as well.
I ran across this article this week and it really helped solidify what I was feeling.
Mothers who pursue professional and personal achievements teach their children the value of independence, perseverance, having a strong work ethic, and doing something you love. These mothers also understand that no parent — be it mom or dad — should be all things at all times to his or her child (in fact, even mothers who stay home should actively seek out other role models for their children).
Staying at home with the kids is a challenge. It’s a lot of hard work and super stressful with its own unique challenges. Honestly though, for me working outside of the home is even harder. There is this awful misconception of “well, working moms get to be away from their kids.” Right, but I don’t necessarily find that a good thing. Sure, if I had the opportunity to work part time, that would be ideal. When you pay child care though, that’s usually pointless. The point is, I want to be with my children. I also just happen to want to be in the workforce, using my education and skills daily. I want a reason to style my hair and put on heels. I know there are stay-at-home moms who do that anyway, to go to PTA meetings and lunch with a friend. I’m not that mom. I am the type who needs more reason to put in the time and effort every day. I know that some moms have 4+ kids and still walk around looking flawless with a moderately clean house. It just isn’t my reality.
I don’t know what the future holds for our family. All I know is that while I’m on this modified bedrest, I will continue to look for ways to earn a steady income from home, soak up the time with my children that we will never get back, and take care of my beautiful home. I intend to return to work after my leave is over, but will be keeping my eyes out for new opportunities. Claudia is going to need bows and shoes and tights and diamonds and well, those cost money.
I will remain open to possibilities and continue to be the best version of myself I know how to be. For now, I think I’ll put on some concealer.